Halloween Night

For this Halloween, enjoy an alternate retelling of the classic Charlie Brown special. By yours truly. Catch it after the break!

The Great Pumpkin

It was Halloween night. Linus was sitting in a local pumpkin patch, doing the same thing he had done last year, and the year before that: He was waiting for the Great Pumpkin. All the other children laughed at him for thinking up such a silly idea. Really, a Halloween version of Santa Claus? There's no such thing. Halloween was originally a Celtic holiday that had nothing to do with children receiving presents. Why should people anyone believe in the Great Pumpkin? But even with a torrent of laughter directed at him, Linus still had hope for this year. Hours had passed. The shouts and screams of joy from trick-or-treaters throughout the town had died down. Linus looked at his watch: 10:28 PM. Halloween would be over soon. He still had an hour and a half left. There was still a chance the Great Pumpkin might come. Two minutes passed. Linus was slowly drifting to sleep. His eyelids slowly sealed themselves shut. Just then, he heard a rustling of leaves. His eyes shot open, he looked in each and every direction. He then looked up and saw what he had been waiting for, but it didn't turn out to be what he had expected.


...................................


"Lucy where's your brother Linus?" Sally asked Linus' big sister. Everyone was enjoying themselves at Charlie Brown's house. He was hosting a Halloween party.

"Oh, he's probably sitting in that stupid pumpkin patch waiting for that stupid Great Pumpkin!" Lucy retorted.

"Oh. Well, I think I'm going to pay him a visit" Charlie Brown's younger sister replied.

"Why?" asked Lucy. "The same thing that happened last is going to happen this year: Nothing."

"Well I think he's lonely" answered Sally with a touch of concern in her voice.

"Ughh, lonely? That blockhead brought it upon himself" Lucy said as she strolled off to the kitchen.

Sally took some apple cider out of the punch bowl and went out the back door into the cold, Hallows eve night. Linus' pumpkin patch was only about 6 or 7 blocks away. It wouldn't be that long of a walk. When Sally got there she could easily see Linus sitting in the middle of the patch. She walked up to him and put her hand on his shoulder. Lunis' head jerked around to see what had touched him.

"Hi!" said Sally cheerfully.

"Oh, it's you" Lunis replied in a semi mono-tone voice.

"Do you need someone to keep you company?" asked Sally.

"No" Linus replied with his back again turned to Sally.

"Why not?" asked Sally.

"I just want to be left alone" Linus replied, coldly.

"Why?" questioned Sally one last time.

Linus didn't reply. He slowly stood up and turned around. By this time, Sally could see that something was wrong with him. His eyes were empty and dark. His face was expressionless Suddenly he started to twitch and the convulse. His head twisted sideways, then started shifting and stretching. His arms and legs began growing longer and longer, his fingers were no longer covered with skin, they were almost like long vines now. Coated with a green so deep it was almost black. These changes applied to his whole body. He was no longer Linus now, he was a tall ghostly figure compiled of rough, withering pumpkin branches and leaves. His entire form was around 12 feet tall. He looked menacing compared to Sally, who was to unnerved to even scream. Long and terrifying wings spread out from the creature's back. On top of the it's shoulders was a large, glowing pumpkin with horrifyingly disturbing face. It's eyes and mouth stretched and moved as if the creature was able to make facial expressions. It's teeth were sharp and slender. It's eyes, which flickered from an unknown light source, were curved downward into a twisted, evil expression. It looked directly down at Sally, who was trembling with fear.

"Are you.....th....the....gre.....great......p..pumpki...."

Before she could finish, Sally let out a scream that could be heard for ten blocks. One that was suddenly cut off.


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"Charlie Brown! We're out of chips!" cried Lucy. Everyone was a having a good time at Charlie Brown's party. It was only now that the food was starting to run out.

"So?" replied Charlie Brown.

"So? SO? Well, get some more! We're all hungry" said Lucy.

"Good grief calm down" said Charlie Brown as he reluctantly put on his jacket and shoes, ready to make a trip to the convenience store down the street.

Five minutes after Charlie Brown left there was a knock on the door. Lucy went and answered it.

"Oh.." she said seeing that it was only Sally.

"Did you find my stupid brother?"

There was no response.

"Hello! I'm talking to you!" Lucy exclaimed, almost yelling. Sally looked up at Lucy.


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"That'll be $3.50" said the cashier. Charlie Brown had bought three bags of chips, hoping it was enough to last the rest of the night.

"Here" said Charlie Brown as he handed the money to the cashier.

"Happy Halloween" said the cashier as he handed Charlie Brown his receipt.

"Uh, you too" answered Charlie Brown as walked out of the door and into the night. As he walked along the sidewalk to his house, he realized something. There were no lights on in any of the houses anymore. There were no sounds of the night either, such as crickets or owls. Everything was.......dreadfully quiet. The closer he got to his house, the more this feeling of unease crept down his spine. His fear reached it's final form when he got to his house. There were no lights on in, and outside the house. Everything was quiet. The only source of light was coming from the two pumpkins that were sitting outside the front door. Charlie Brown slowly walked toward the front steps of his house and then, with his entire body shaking, climbed up the stairs. He opened the door and walked inside. He was met with a nauseating smell. A smell of rot and decomposure. The air was cold and unwelcoming. Only the moonlight coming through the windows could guide him through the living room. His foot struck something, almost causing him to trip. He look down and saw something that sent him reeling in horror. It was Schroeder, lying motionless and cold. His limbs were twisted in unnatural ways. His entire body was wrapped in vines. As Charlie Brown stumbled around the room in shock, he found this same fate had happened to everyone else. Some people were hanging from the ceiling by vines. Some were tired to the walls.

"Dead....they're all dead!" exclaimed Charlie Brown. He didn't know how to properly reacting. It was all to much for him to take in. Before he could feel anything else, there was noise up stairs. A creaking, slithering noise that slowly made it's way to the top of the steps, and then began to descend. Nothing could've prepared Charlie Brown for this. A tall, menacing figure was making it's way down the steps. It's long legs and arms were made of dark-green vines. It's evil looking wings were half folded in and a hot flame was almost burning through it's twisted pumpkin face. Charlie Brown, paralyzed with fear, stumbled and fell backwards. The thing reached the bottom of the steps and made it's way to Charlie Brown. It crouched down and used it's long, rough fingers to entangle Charlie Brown. There's was nothing he could do to escape.

"Stop struggling" the creature said. Only the voice wasn't coming from it's mouth. Charlie Brown could hear it in his head.
The thing stooped lower, it's face less that two feet away from Charlie Brown's. He could feel the heat coming from the monster's glowing face.

"This is the end" Charlie thought to himself.

"Do you want to see my face?" The creature said, almost whispering. Before Charlie Brown could reply, the creature's pumpkin head shifted. The front of it's head slowly opened up, revealing its true face.
Inside the pumpkin...

Was...

None other than...

Bill Murray.
The creature-turned-Bill Murray leaned closer to Charlie Brown's face and whispered "No one will ever believe you..."
Before Charlie Brown could reply, the pumpkin's face closed and the creature stood up. It let go of Charlie Brown and turned to leave. It smashed through the front door, walked to the middle of the front yard, turned to look at Charlie Brown one last time and flew off into the night.

"Why do these things always happen to me?"



You better look out
For the harvest is here

You better watch your back
And mot shed a tear

You better look out...
...and hope you don't die

For the Great Pumpkin is back
The end is nigh.